


Ice and Loneliness (Ice and Lioness)

by MoonlightShines (Thatkillervibe)



Category: Stargirl (TV 2020)
Genre: Coolcat, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Post Season 1, Teen Angst, Yolanda POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:20:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29149620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thatkillervibe/pseuds/MoonlightShines
Summary: Courtney blinked down at Yolanda’s beloved helmet as if it were an explosive.“You’re not giving Wildcat up, are you?”“No. I just want a break. Is that okay? I need—I want a break.”Then, Yolanda met Cameron.The second time.
Relationships: Cameron Mahkent & Yolanda Montez
Kudos: 5





	Ice and Loneliness (Ice and Lioness)

It’s not that she meant to pull away, it just sort of happened. 

For a while her friends gave her space, and she knew she was the one needing it. Old habits from hellish freshman year resurfaced and Yolanda made it very hard to be fun around. Her clothes went dark and loose again, eyes downcast on the floor. It was better not to be noticed. It was easier to disappear. She turned corners to skip lunches at the loser table. Sometimes she came home to meet her brother and her voice was so coarse she realized she barely used it all day. 

Yolanda didn’t want to be in mourning, because she never really loved him.

She didn’t want to drown in regret either, because there was nothing she wouldn’t do over. 

But it was easier to get sucked back down by the dark vacuum, so she let herself stay there for a while, promising she’d return to Courtney and Beth and the Pit Stop eventually. When the hurting was over. When she could look them in the eye again. When she was ready and God was pleased with Yolanda again, but not only God—Herself too.

Courtney blinked down at Yolanda’s beloved helmet as if it were an explosive.

_“You’re not giving Wildcat up, are you?”_

_“No. I just want a break. Is that okay? I need—I want a break._ ” 

_“Of course,”_ Pat said reassuringly before Courtney could interject. _“You take your time.”_

  
  
  
  


And that was hard to do, when it was so easy not to try. 

That’s when she met Cameron. 

The second time. 

“Hey,” he says, glancing up at her when she crouched below to get underneath the bleachers. Seniors from years past have moved an old couch there, abandoned from the universal fear of getting found out by Mrs. Brooks, whose whistle grated on everyone’s nerves. 

Yolanda drops her bag to the deadened grass with a thud. “Hi.” 

She studies Cameron cautiously. He had undergone an alarming transformation over Winter break. He wore bags like poorly applied makeup and his face looked sallow. His clothes made hers look flashy in comparison. He adorned black hoodies and let his dark hair fall over his face, like he wanted to hide. His hands twitches in his pockets too. At first, she thought he itched to sketch something, but now she wasn’t so sure. 

“Can I sit?” she asks. 

He scoots over. “Sure.” 

She knows that he’s grieving as well, but it’s difficult to understand, when Icicle had done so much harm. 

She always wants to tell him, a heaviness pressed against her chest that urges her to explain.

But explain what? Cameron doesn’t know. One day his father was alive. The next, he wasn’t. 

It’s not Yolanda’s place to say why. 

Peering into his side, she looks at his tablet. 

“What are you working on?” 

“It’s nothing.” 

Yolanda deflates at his tone. She gets its none of her business but after his flowers on her locker, she thought they had a secret understanding of sorts about his art. 

Guess not. 

“Ah,” Yolanda says, pretending like it didn’t mean much. 

Cameron lets out a deliberately slow breath. Yolanda catches it in the corner of her eye. 

It’s January and it’s cold. 

But it’s not _that_ cold. 

Yolanda stills. Cameron jerks in his seat, suddenly hyper vigilant— he sticks one hand into his hoodie’s pocket, the other to put away his tablet to leave her alone. 

She closes her eyes as he mutters out a goodbye that sounds so far from the kind person she knows he is and takes a risk. Yolanda springs off the couch to grab his wrist. 

Cameron bristles, turning with a warning flash in his eyes, “Get off me.”

“Cameron. I know.” 

Something changes in his expression. And then, it’s not just his expression. It’s his eyelashes, clumping together, crystalizing in front of her. 

“You have powers,” she says again. Yolanda takes a step forward. “It’s okay, I promise. I won’t tell anyone. I know.” 

She loses her balance at the cold front, and for a second Yolanda thinks she can’t breathe. But two very cold arms are wrapped around her back and the firm shape of a boy—A new, unfamiliar boy— is being pressed against her, cold ice above the zip of her jacket, against her collarbone and neck. 

Cameron shudders, it’s like ice breaking. 

Yolanda is paralyzed. It’s shocking and forceful and cold—but she doesn’t feel it in her heart. 

**Author's Note:**

> Listen.....
> 
> Coolcat has potential


End file.
